Five Million Butterflies
by Everafterjunkie
Summary: Chad Dylan Cooper was never one to get nervous, but there's something about this girl that gives him the butterflies, butterflies that make him puke on her, butterflies that get worse as they grow closer.Five million butterflies. Channy one-shot for Heidi


**A/N: **This is dedicated to my friend Heidi, also known as **Willow. Heidi Erickson**. She wrote me a lovely story, **Nico and Grady: Masterminds of Matchmaking** and hopefully this can equate to hers. Thank you to **Maddy** for taking the time to beta this for me. Hope you like it!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

**FIVE MILLION BUTTERFLIES**

Chad had never been one to get nervous. He was an actor. A perfectionist. He saw the world as his oyster, and nothing could stop him. Girls were just chicks; they meant nothing to him. All he'd do was flash a smile and they'd be his. But then Sonny came along.

And so did the butterflies.

-**One Butterfly**-

A game of musical chairs.

A game he was supposed to win easily.

She'd pushed him into it, with her stupid bawking.

And he'd stupidly agreed.

"You know, you're pretty confident for someone who's gonna LOSE!"

And he was pretty confident.

They circled round and round and round, aimlessly and with that intense adrenaline you get when you don't know what's going to happen.

He didn't fear her at all.

She was his enemy.

And then she fell.

"Ow, my ankle! I think something snapped."

Typical girl. Stupid and gets hurt easily.

"That looks pretty serious, we better get you to a doctor."

So he gave her his hand and acted chivalrously.

Only to be flipped and beaten.

For the first time in his life he had this weird sensation inside, like a tiny, little butterfly in his lower stomach.

But he accepted the defeat amiably, he accepted all her terms and said that he liked So Random on his next show.

But it was worth it.

All for that little butterfly he got inside.

-**Ten Butterflies**-

He didn't know why he did it.

Chad Dylan Cooper was supposed to care about himself, nothing else.

"Do you care?" she asks, tilting her head in her blonde wig and trying to provoke him.

"I dunno . . . let's give it a shot."

For some reason, he listened to her.

And he didn't know why.

But when she says . . .

"I should have known, you don't care."

Why on earth does he want to protest?

To prove her wrong?

To make her happy?

He just didn't know.

And so as he listened to Marshall introducing her biggest fan, Eric, he impulsively put on the weird beard and the fake casts and pushed his way through to the stage to stand next to her.

She sighs. "Eric is . . ."

"Your biggest fan!" he interrupts.

The smile on her face, and the disgust on Tawni's is enough to make it worthwhile.

"Why are you helping me?" she asks.

He doesn't even know himself.

"I'm not helping you . . . I just want to try on the beard . . ."

"Sounds like somebody cares," Sonny teases.

"Somebody wanted to try on a weird beard . . . " he insists.

"Cares," she coughs.

"Beards."

"Cares."

"Beards."

"Beards."

"Cares."

"Gotcha." She grins.

He's so determined to not agree with her, he admits to caring.

He looks shyly away, not his confident self.

He doesn't know why he's not as confident.

But that feeling he got when she tricked him is amplified, so that it's like ten butterflies dancing delicately around his lower abdomen.

He doesn't want to look up at her, he doesn't want to make this feeling get any worse, so he claps and looks away.

It's an addicting feeling.

A feeling he wants to stop.

But an addicting feeling nonetheless.

-**One Hundred Butterflies**—

They're standing on his set.

Arguing with Selena Gomez in between.

The fluttering had started as soon as he'd saw her drag her little, cute director's chair across his set.

The jittering is getting much worse, so much so that every time he sees her he feels at least a few butterflies.

She aggravates him. Aggravates him beyond belief.

"Gosh! I was _wrong_! You two should never be together!" Selena yells, frustrated.

He can't help the anger that wells up within him.

"Who does she think she is to tell us we can't like each other? If I wanna like you . . . I WILL!"

He can't help it.

He likes doing the opposite of what everyone expects.

And the thought that he could never be with Sonny . . . even if he wanted too, feels like his heart has jumped up in his throat and it's choking him.

"Yeah! And if I wanna like you . . . I WILL!"

Maybe she doesn't mean it in the same context as him.

Doesn't mean that some day, she _wants_ to like him.

But when she reveals she feels the same.

He can't help himself.

"If I wanna think you have pretty hair . . . I WILL!"

He can't believe he just said that.

But, my God, does he love her hair.

Her incredibly pretty, adorable, sweet-smelling hair.

"If I wanna think you have sparkly eyes, I WILL!"

Selena storms off the set, refusing to be in his movie.

But he doesn't follow her.

He follows Sonny, who just happens to be following Selena.

"Aw, she was nice!" Sonny compliments, a small smile on her face.

Suddenly his confidence is back, his stomach is cool again. No fire, no butterflies, no nothing.

And then . . .

"So . . . do you really think I have pretty hair?"

Then they're back. Like someone's opened a cage door that leads to his stomach and a hundred, flapping butterflies, all waging war against his stomach.

The lump in his throat is back.

And he is once again _shy_.

How does she make him, Chad Dylan Cooper, greatest actor of his generation, _shy_?

"I dunno," he answers, unable to look at her. "Do you really think I have sparkly eyes?"

Why does he care?

He doesn't even know.

Plenty of people think he has sparkly eyes.

But it makes him happy to think she could be one of those people.

"So . . . do you wanna be in my movie . . . ? I kinda need a Sonny." He offers.

He wonders if she really knows how much he needs a Sonny.

He needs her more than he can control.

It's strange but . . . he likes not being in control.

It's new, it's exciting, and he's addicted already.

But now it's not just for that _feeling_, it's not just not being in control, it's her great smile, her big brown eyes, it's her stupid cute that he's most certainly addicted too.

"Fine," she answers, smiling.

He starts to walk away as he continues fine-fine-good-good fighting with her.

He jokes about setting up an audition for her.

But when he sees her "Really, Chad? Really?" reaction, he can keep up the pretence no longer.

He lifts up his megaphone to his mouth and quietly says "Fine, you have the part".

He can't stop the small smile that creeps on to his lips.

It's her _stupid,_ addictive grin.

How is it even possible to hate and love something at one time?

-**One Thousand Butterflies**—

"Oh you meant between us, gotcha, we don't have secrets, do we?"

The two are backstage on Gilroy's show, and she's just offered to make a pact.

He doesn't know why.

But as soon as it came out of his mouth, he wasn't so sure that they _didn't_ have secrets.

How can he not even know?

He's Mr. Smooth, he's Mr. Play-it-cool, so why is he acting shy again?

"I dunno . . . do we?" Sonny asks nervously, unsure.

He's stumped.

And he most definitely doesn't want to be the first person to ask her if them liking each other counts as a secret.

"What about . . . ?" He trails off helplessly.

His stomach is nothing but nerves.

A thousand butterflies jittering around his stomach.

He gulps. "Maybe . . . we shouldn't mention us liking . . ." He trails off again, his heart stuck in his throat and beating wildly.

Sonny bites her lip slightly. "I mean . . . wait a second . . . like us . . . liking each other?"

Suddenly the butterflies get worse, as if they have five minutes left to live and all they can do is fly around and hit the thin line of his stomach.

He feels hot, _sweaty_ even. It's new and unnerving and worse than ever before. "Yeah, I mean, don't really wanna talk about my _feelings_ in front of a live studio audience." He would laugh, if he could force it out of his throat.

"Yeah, yeah right!" Sonny agrees, immensely relived he's returned the sentiment. "Especially feelings we're never talked about before . . ." she says shyly.

"You have feelings?" he asks quickly.

And the butterflies won't stop.

How can they even get _worse_?

He's never felt like this before. It's terrifying. He's never _not_ been sure if a girl liked him or not.

"Do _you_ have feelings?" Sonny asks, her eyes shining brightly, but she looks almost as nervous as he feels.

He's known her for months now.

Known her smile.

Her infectious laughter.

Her upbeat addictive personality.

Her everything.

"I mean, since you're really asking and it's just, just the two of us . . ." he says in return.

Is she really going to make him admit it?

He can hardly admit it to himself.

"Right, yeah and there's no cameras or anything this time . . ." Sonny says, her voice unstable.

"Yeah . . . I really . . . it's just . . ." Oh great, now he sounds like a right idiot, the butterflies making him worse than he's ever been.

"Listen, it's what I'm here for." Sonny smiles reassuringly.

But it's anything but reassuring.

It's petrifying.

It scares him to death.

"You go first," Sonny insists.

"No, you go first," he insists back automatically.

He can't say it first.

He can hardly say it at all.

"You go first . . . well okay, same time." Sonny compromises.

"Yeah," he agrees weakly.

Because he is weak.

She _makes_ him weak.

"One." Sonny rocks back on her heels awkwardly. "Two."

"Yeah, I was gonna say that . . uhm . . . two and a half?" He tries to beat her so he doesn't have to say three.

"Three!" Sonny says quickly. "I like you!"

He misses his cue.

They were supposed to say it together.

And he can't even open his mouth.

"As a friend!" she adds quickly.

And the butterflies are dead.

They're replaced by a brick.

A brick that sinks his stomach lower in his abdomen than ever before.

"I like you as a friend, too," he replies quietly.

But it's anything but the truth.

"That was so much easier to say then I thought it would be." Sonny smiles.

He follows her out.

It wasn't easy for him.

Especially since the butterflies were back again as soon as she smiled at him.

And he hated it.

-**Five Hundred Thousand Butterflies**—

"What is it that you want?" He asks, ticked off beyond belief.

She charges onto _his_ set and is totally rude to him. Then makes fun of him.

Who makes up that they're a free lance tennis judge anyway?

"Answers," she replies.

Answers?

What is he? The Answer man? Yes, she makes him feel all jittery, but sometimes she drives him completely insane!

"To what?" he asks, irritated and a little confused.

"To how it all ends . . . to how long it's gonna be before you ask out the girl you're destined to be with," Sonny tells him dreamily.

Butterflies again.

He wants him to ask her out?

Butterflies, butterflies, butterflies, five hundred thousand butterflies waging war against him.

"I'm not sure I can answer that," he replies quietly.

He doesn't want her to make a fool of him.

She said she liked him as a friend.

Was this some kind of prank?

"Aren't you in charge of your own destiny?" she asks, excited.

"I guess," Chad replies.

"Well then it's time to say, enough! When two people are right for each other, there's only one thing to do."

He can't believe she's asking him to ask her out.

And he's so excited about it.

He can't help the grin that takes over his face.

" How long have you felt this way?" he asks, excited by the prospect of finally being with her.

" Since yesterday. It hasn't been long, but it hit me like a ton of bricks."

"I guess I feel the same way," he says coyly.

And he does feel the same way.

He has for a long time.

He has no butterflies as he says happily "Sonny, will you go out with me?"

He's sure that she'll say yes.

And when he lets her down, he's too taken over by embarrassment to let the butterflies get the best of him.

But all she has to say is "Yeah, I'll go out with you."

And the five hundred thousand butterflies are back.

Fierce and fiery.

And he's never been this happy.

He doesn't care if he has thousands of butterflies everyday if he just gets to see her smile.

**-One Million Butterflies—**

He's nervous.

There's no doubt about that.

But he is Chad Dylan Cooper and he's staying cool and collected.

"Wow this place is amazing, Chad . . . so private!" Sonny compliments, walking over to a plush black leather chair and seating herself down.

He grins and tucks in her chair. "Well, I wanted to bring you some place special. Yoshi here is the best sushi chef in Hollywood."

And he did want to bring her some place special.

Any other girl and they'd be lucky to get Suki (the tenth best sushi chef in Hollywood), but as soon as she'd agreed he'd been on the phone to Yoshi straight away.

"Yoshi, my man. OH! Jellyfish, jellyfish, jellyfish." He jokes around with Yoshi.

Wanting to make her giggle.

It works.

"Aw, that's cute! Hey Yoshi, shark!" Sonny calls him over, beaming as she makes a shark gesture with Yoshi. "Shark, shark, shark!" Sonny bursts out laughing and he's immediately intimidated by her.

Her shark is so much cooler than his jellyfish.

He hates not being cooler than her.

Normally all his dates fawn over how cool he is, but right now he can't think of one cool thing to say.

She must think he's an idiot.

Sonny looks at him with brown eyes, biting her lip. He doesn't know what she's thinking, but he knows what he's thinking.

She's adorable.

More than adorable.

What's a word you can use that's better than adorable? Beautiful? Extraordinary? Extravagant?

His palms are sweating and he tells himself to be cool.

This date is important to him and he doesn't want to look like a loser.

He leans his head on his hand. "So..."

Only to fall out of his chair.

He falls awkwardly on the floor, and even though it hurts he's right back up again.

"Chad . . . are you okay?" Sonny asks him, concerned.

"I'm good . . . pfft, yeah I'm cool," he insists.

He's so not cool.

He's anything but.

He wishes he could just be his normal self.

But instead, he grabs some water and begins drinking it like there's no tomorrow. It doesn't make him look any cooler, but it is refreshing.

Sonny looks up from her menu, looking so incredibly cute that he gets ever more nervous. "You know this all looks so great, why don't you order since you know so much about sushi?" she asks sweetly.

He freezes.

He's forgotten everything he knows about sushi.

And the butterflies are worse than ever before, they're eating his insides and doing horrible, horrible things to him.

He can't speak.

He can't move.

All he can do is drink and hope she'll stop asking.

"Uh . . . Chad?" she asks, looking worried.

"Yeah?" he squeaks.

Sonny puts an encouraging hand over his and asks. "Do you wanna order?"

The butterflies are exploding inside him.

She touched his hand.

He wanted to touch her hand first.

This was all so logical in his head.

What kind of a man was he?

He tells himself to stop drinking and just about manages it.

He convinces himself to tell her she makes him nervous.

He goofily smiles. "Sonny . . . I need to tell you something . . ."

But when he looks to her, the butterflies must have invaded his body and changed his vision because . . .

It was like she was an angel.

Her hair blowing in the wind.

So incredibly beautiful.

"Yes, Chad?" she asks in a low, sultry voice.

He needs to get rid of these butterflies.

Unfortunately being sick on her is the only way he can think to do it.

He gets up and runs away to the sound of Sonny's screams.

He is love-sick.

No pun intended.

**-Five Million Butterflies—**

. . .

He thought he was nervous on their first date.

. . .

_He goofily smiles. "Sonny . . . I need to tell you something . . ." _

_But when he looks to her, the butterflies must have invaded his body and changed his vision because . . ._

_It was like she was an angel. _

_Her hair blowing in the wind. _

_So incredibly beautiful._

"_Yes, Chad?" she asks in a low, sultry voice. _

_He needs to get rid of these butterflies. _

_Unfortunately being sick on her is the only way he can think to do it. _

_He gets up and runs away to the sound of Sonny's screams. _

_. . ._

He thought he was nervous when he first kissed her.

. . .

_They've been dating for a few weeks now and he's never been happier. _

_The problem?_

_He's too chicken to kiss her. _

"_Hey, Chad," comes a voice from behind him. _

_He smiles at the voice automatically. He spins around on his dressing table chair, jumps up and engulfs her in a hug automatically, making Sonny giggle._

"_How you doing?" he asks, moving a strand of hair from her eyes. _

"_Bit better, so glad that whole stealing thing is over." Sonny gives a weak smile and he hugs her again. _

"_I knew you were innocent. My lady would never steal, well anything except my heart." _

_Sonny grins like she's just met Kelly Clarkson and squeezes him hard. "That is the sweetest thing you've ever said to me." She beams. _

"_No problem, Sonny Brothers." He grins at his own joke. _

_He hated Trey Brothers more than James Conroy._

_Stealing his phone was one thing . . . but his ba-bangs? That was something else. _

_Sonny pushes herself away from him. "How could you say that? You know I didn't do anything." _

"_I was joking, Sonny," he insists. _

_And he was joking. _

_Wasn't she supposed to have a sense of humour? _

"_Well if you think I'm such a thief, maybe I should marry Trey . . . at least he might kiss me!" _

_He was shocked. Not only was she saying she'd rather marry that scumbag, she was saying he didn't have the guts to kiss her. _

"_Oh really?" he mocks, scorned beyond belief. _

_She's not that far away from him at the moment, close enough for him to smell her sweet perfume. _

"_You have no _idea_ how much I want to kiss you, Sonny Monroe, so do not even go there!_"

_Sonny is stunned, as if she's talking to a small child she encourages him softly. "I'm sorry, Chad. Come here and show me," she coos. _

_He accepts her hand and stands in front of her. _

_She's nervous too, he can see that. So he places a gentle hand on her jaw, and another on her hip. _

_His insides are screaming. _

_Everything in his being is screaming. _

_He's never been so nervous before in his whole life. _

_She gives him a small smile. _

_And that's all he needs, he leans into her mouth. _

_Closer. _

_Closer. _

_Closer. _

_Until finally he closes his eyes as he feels her soft lips beneath his. _

_He's kissed plenty of girls before. _

_But he will always regard that kiss as his first real kiss, and he hopes that Sonny will too. _

. . .

He thought he was nervous when he first told her he loved her.

. . .

"_This beach is so beautiful, thanks for bringing me here, Chad." Sonny smiles, digging her toes into the white sand before her. _

"_You're beautiful." He smirks, leaning into her closer on their picnic blanket and pressing a kiss to her ear. _

"_Why thank you, Mr. Cooper." _

"_Actually there's a reason I brought you here," he tells her, nervously worrying his lip. _

_Sonny frowns in confusion. "Why's that?" _

"_I want to tell you something," he says, unsure of how his voice is still calm. _

_Sonny puts one comforting hand on his leg and rubs soothingly. "Has something happened?" she asks, her voice full of concern. _

_He can't believe he's so nervous. _

_This should be easy. _

_People say it all the time. _

_I love you. _

_Simple. _

"_Sonny, I—" Sonny's smiling at him intently, her gaze soft and her smile bright. "Heck, I love you." he says softly. _

_It comes from the heart. _

_Sonny's jaw drops open and she stares at him for a few seconds. _

_The butterflies are back, but they all relax again when she launches herself into him and whispers "I love you, too, silly!" in his hair. _

. . .

But nothing compares to the feeling he's got inside now.

He's been with Sonny for five years and he's never felt so nervous.

And that is saying something.

"Chad, is everything okay?" Sonny asks, snuggling next to him on their sofa. "Work troubles?" she asks, pressing a kiss to his shoulder and kneading the other shoulder a little with one hand.

"Everything's fine." He just about manages.

Sonny grins, not believing him for a second. "I know when you're lying, now tell me what's the matter." she demands.

He takes a deep breath.

He really never thought this day would come.

He slips off of the sofa so that he's kneeling in front of her on the floor. "Allison Monroe, I—"

Sonny wrinkles her nose in disgust. "Don't call me Allison, Chadford!"

Chad chuckles and immediately feels a little more relaxed. "Sonny, I never thought that . . . I never thought that I'd ever do this. The word commitment wasn't in my vocabulary. But then you came along and changed everything . . ."

Sonny raises both eyebrows and takes his two hands in hers as he kneels down on one knee.

"You're smart, beautiful, kind, sweet, unfortunately funny, but I can learn to live with that."

Sonny hits him playfully on the shoulder.

"But I've never loved anyone more than I love you."

Sonny smiles, touched. "I feel the same way . . . I'm so happy when I'm with you. I hate it when you're not with me."

His smile lights the room. "I don't either. And with that in mind . . . well, I'm not rushing you . . . you can set whatever date you want, but Sonny . . ." He pulls a small, blue velvet box out of his pocket and opens it up and clears his throat. "Sonny Monroe, will you marry me?"

She looks down at the ring in the box. It's silver, and a large, round diamond solitaire sits at its center. She just stares at it, marvelling in its beauty and the way it sparkles in the candlelight. "Sonny?" he says, sounding slightly worried.

She hasn't said a word.

She's just staring at the ring.

And he gets nervous again.

Unbelievably nervous.

"Yes," she says.

"Yes, what do I want, or yes, you'll marry me?" he asks, a slightly panicked laugh in his voice.

He prays with all his might that it's the second one.

Five million butterflies inside him.

Relentless.

And yet, they're still addictive to him.

"Yes. I'll marry you. I will marry you, Chad Dylan Cooper."

He grins and pulls the ring from its box, sliding it onto the ring finger of her left hand. Sonny tilts her hand back and forth, admiring the glints of rainbow light caught in the stone. When she looks up at him he's staring at her with adoration. "How's a year from now sound?" she asks. "It takes at least a year to plan a good wedding. I think a year from now would be good, and we'd have enough time to finish our movies before planning."

"Whatever you want," he says. He leans forward and she meets him halfway and they brush lips once, twice, three times. "I love you," he says.

"I love you, too."

And the butterflies fly away.

But he knows they'll fly back again.

Especially when he sees her walking up that aisle.

Especially when they try for a baby.

Especially when they have a baby.

Especially when they become grandparents.

Who is he kidding?

Where Sonny's concerned, he'll always be the dorky, shy guy with five million butterflies inside. Because when he's with her he's not Chad Dylan Cooper anymore.

He's just Chad.

**A/N:** This took a long time to write. Anyone who read it all the way through, I salute you. It's 15 pages long on Word at size 10, so I hope some people managed to read it all the way through. Even if it did take forever ;) Please take the time to tell me what you think (:

**-Everafterjunkie **


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